Sobriety is my priority

Sobriety is my priority

Phone

+1 778 381 5686

Sobriety is my priority

My name is Irvin, and I am a recovering alcoholic. Everybody around me such as family, friends and co-workers were so worried about my addiction lifestyle. Therefore one night when I overdosed on an opioid and went to the hospital ward, That night became the crucial point in my life. When I woke up my parents met me in the hospital. I had so much remorse that I said to my dad I want to change my life .I don’t want to ruin more of my life because of drugs or drinking. Therefore the doctor referred me to a rehabilitation facility. I never knew in my life what the meaning of “sobriety”. All I knew was drugs, drugs and drugs. You know, I felt powerless over drinking or drugging and I finally gave up after the battle of life and death. My life became hopeless, I seemed to be helpless and useless. Even a single hope to change life was not left in my mind before overdose. Therefore when I went to the treatment centre I chose to get out of denial. For me denial was not accepting that i have a drinking or drugging problem. But one of my friends at the treatment centre introduced me to a person whose name was Jeff and he was an addiction counsellor. He made me realise that which part of my addiction had positive consequences. For one moment, I understood that I had a problem.when i went to the treatment centre and i realised how much emotional and mental pain my parents had gone through for my addiction issues. I decided not to ruin my life no more. This was the beginning stage of my recovery and sobriety when I realised the destruction caused by my addiction. Therefore I made a decision to fully surrender myself to my addiction issues.

For the first few days staying sober and getting involved with sober friends were hard. But after that when I had no hangover, no drug related worries and no new problems were created by me, my life became valuable and precious to me . I realised at the treatment centre that why i ended up here. Why not ? other people ended up at the treatment centre, therefore i admitted i am an alcoholic !! .That was the point where my journey of life started and I stayed sober with the help of fellowship. For me, staying sober is a gift of god and working on 12 steps is a gift of the program which made my life easier and smoother today.

However for me, I finally gave up on drugs and the efforts made became the real work which kept me sober since today. You know, I never knew that life could be changed and I would be able to get out of my painful addiction behaviour. When I did the very first step, “I Admitted I was powerless over alcohol and my life had become unmanageable”. This step became true for me. However my life was unmanageable in certain perspectives such as relationships, financial and discipline was the one thing which i was missing in my life. I became willing to change myself and willingness was the key to my sobriety. Today I always do things I have been told to do such as getting involved in meetings, doing personal inventory on a consistent basis and connection with the fellowship is the most crucial part of my sobriety. When I found out other people suffering from the same disease of alcoholism , I understood that I am not the only one who has an addiction issue. However when I fully understood the 12th step it became a great opportunity for me which kept me sober. Recovering alcoholics or the suffering alcoholics today are the part of my sobriety with whom I can share my experience, strength and hope. All I can say I am sober today and helping newcomers to the program is the keypoint of my sobriety.

I never knew that sobriety is progressive like my addiction was . You know, today walking through the journey of AA is making my problems not complicated, but simple too. However I will never forget the connection which I built up through the treatment centre. My treatment friends are the true friends who always help me to stay sober . For this turning point of my life I am so grateful and will never give back. My life today is way better than it was during my addiction when I used to beg for even a few dollars from my friends or co-workers. Sobriety for me is the first priority to my life. At the end, I pray to god that I help all those people who are suffering like me from this disease of alcoholism so that they can enjoy their lives in a wonderful manner. Today I celebrate the emotions, feelings of my family and they are happy too that I became sober. All the things I have achieved today such as family, job and relationships are because of that overdose night. If that night would have not come, I might be suffering through pain of drugs or might be dead. Thank god for that wonderful turning stage of my life.

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Phone

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Willingness

Willingness

Phone

+1 778 381 5686

Willingness

Most of my life in the addiction period I never had an answer to my problems. Even though there was no human power that could change my attitude and even my addiction lifestyle. However people surrounding me like friends, cousins and childhood best friends have seen my addiction getting worse and worse according to different circumstances where I had even stolen materialistic things from my own home to feed my addiction. But solutions to my problems were only drugs and alcohol. I never had a desire to change my life and get out of addiction because the company of bad bad friends was always with me through my journey. My parents had religious beliefs and I always had a negative perception of the circumstances that happened to me . Most of my life I had spent was free of peace and relaxation, therefore I always took the advantage of my parents emotions and feelings to fulfill my addiction. For my addiction I never realised how much pain and misery my parents have gone through.

For me, always my drugs were the first priority to me. On the other hand, when I had no choice and even my relationships built up with my parents were falling off. Family troubles, finances to feed my addiction and social life of myself was even so ruined that I had no happiness and peace left in my life . Most of my childhood friends had tried to convince me that why I am ruining my crucial period of life just doing drugs and alcohol. As a teenager I was never able to find out the negative consequences of my behaviour towards others. All of my friends told me that addiction would take you to a certain point in your life when you would realise your past and could do nothing to change about that. Blackouts after alcohol and drugs became common for me and police cells, hospitals were the part of my life. However the only thing I knew was that only drugs, drugs, and drugs. Even nobody was helping me get out of addiction. All the good friends I meant were just there to take advantage of me. But according to me, all of them were my true friends. Moreover my addicted behaviour became so harmful for others in the society. Addiction was affecting my character, lifestyle and mental health too.

Infact, one day I got involved at a crime scene where I just got caught by cops with that much drug to feed myself. That night was the turning point of my life. Cops took me to the prison and in the prison I got introduced to the program of AA. The very first day of the AA meeting in the prison became the answer to my addiction. When a chairperson allowed me to share and I said I am an alcoholic and my name is aron. From this point willingness to change life became the keypoint where I admitted I do have a problem with drugs and alcohol. Therefore I took one step everyday to head towards the meeting. Once I became willing, the journey to get out of addiction became so much easier for me. I use to spend some time introducing myself to other members before and after the meetings so that I can build up e healthy relationships with them. Since that day my life became unimaginable. I am sober and all the friends are supportive to help me in any perspective.

For me personally I never thought that there is a solution to my addiction problem. But once I got it, and I never looked back. You know, today in my life I have loads of relaxation and true friends of AA who are caring and loving. Willingness was the crucial part of my recovery. After I went to prison, I completely surrendered myself to the program because I didn’t want to create any more troubles so that the criminal justice could forgive me. I had so much remorse for what I did to my family, friends and society . My relationships today are meaningful and valuable to me. If I had never found this program I would be dead. So at the end, I am grateful that this program worked for me. However I had a desire to change my life but I didn’t find any solution before the prison life. Even though I was sentenced for one month jail time and I accepted that freely with no complaints because I knew that I was responsible for my own actions. Therefore today I am enjoying a reliable , honest and freedom free life. It is just because of my willingness. If I had not learnt anything out of my crime scene, this opportunity to recover from addiction would never have been successful. Nowadays I am involved with the fellowship of true friends and going to meetings on a consistent basis is part of my healthy lifestyle.

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You identity is kept confidential and will never be revealed or published without your consent.
[email protected]

If you believe you need immediate assistance, call 911 or your local crisis line.

Phone

+1 778 381 5686

Copyright © 2020 SoberLife Foundation. All rights reserved.

Sobriety is my priority

Sponsorship

Phone

+1 778 381 5686

Sponsorship

Sponsorship is a connection between two persons where a sponsee can share his feelings and addiction related problems to find out positive results. However a sponsor could be one who has at least two or three years of sobriety and has been through 12 steps of AA. When I came to the program of AA . I didn’t know how the sponsorship part would work for my recovery. According to me, a sponsor could be the person who brings you to the program of AA. I got introduced toa treatment facility called “Bolister” when I Was in the peak period of my addiction.

One day I was sitting alone in a treatment facility and my mind was running like a storm. At that point, I thought nobody could understand my problems of recovery. After discharge from the treatment facility how can I stay sober If I have nobody to talk to. With whom I can share my addiction issues. Therefore when I realised that I must need a person to talk to on a consistent basis about my recovery so that I can express my feelings, emotions and problems. Moreover rather than having a battle going on within my mind. I decided to make a sponsor who is always helping me out on the journey of life. I made a sponsor who is caring and loving.

Somehow my self- will decisions never come up with positive results so I decided to take the guidance of my sponsor. Infact, One recovering alcoholic helping another alcoholic became an important part for my recovery. I always use to have a conversation with my sponsor when I am surrounded with a bunch of troubles. During my addiction period all I knew was that I do drugs to isolate myself. You know, coming to the program of AA and admitting the first step which says, “we were powerless over alcohol and our lives had become unmanageable” became the solution to most of my addiction problems. Even though fellowship of AA is the group of people who are walking with me always to help me stay sober. But sponsor is the one with whom I can discuss all of my addiction related and even life problems too. A tough sponsor is the one I have today who never let me down and listen to my problems in a serious manner. I have been to the treatment facilities a bunch of times but it never worked for me because I had not made any kind of effort and even not sponsored to stay sober. But today my sponsor is helping me out with various troubles of life, even with addiction related. You know, sponsorship is the key point of my recovery and sobriety today.. My sponsor is the one who knows all my past history of addiction and without.

However I know that without the help of a sponsor I will never be able to survive in my life. Moreover my sponsor is vital for me to introduce me to various programs of recovery such as 12 steps, stepwork meetings and guidance through the big book. When I turn over myself will and life to the care of god . Then I became willing to write down the personal inventory and make amends to the people I had harmed. I am always honest to my sponsor in every perspective. For the first time in my sober life I have a true friend to whom I am rigorous honest which is my sponsor. Everytime I am in trouble I call my sponsor and without exception he is willing to help me out. Even though sponsorship is a great part of my life today. Even though I have a tough sponsor, he makes me learn new things out of his experiences. Today 3 years of sobriety is a big achievement for me and it is just because I have a good relationship with my sponsor.

When I had gone through my step 5 , I was rigorous honest to my sponsor and I shared the true facts of my addiction. I admitted my wrongs. All I know today is that understanding and positive communication with my sponsor on a regular basis is the solution to all of my problems . Before coming to AA, I had no true relationship with anybody. But today I have my sponsor for whom I am grateful. My sponsor is always so concerned about my recovery and goes through 12 steps once a year. For me, sponsorship played a very crucial role in my recovery !. I believe if I had no sponsor who could understand my addiction, I should have not been sober for 3 years. However, fellowship is very important for me as well as my sponsor. At the end, now I am planning to sponsor a newcomer. I know it will be difficult for me to stay sober if I don’t give back what is offered to me when I come to the doors of AA. Responsible sponsor is the one who understands me and is able to focus on my weak points rather than ignoring them. Thank god I made a sponsor. Otherwise for me, it would be hard to stay sober on my own. I want to offer the same guidance as I have gained from my sponsor so that the newcomer’s life could become wonderful and he can achieve the positive goals in their life.

Contact Our Volunteers

Your consultation is absolutely free - Let’s talk!

Got Questions ?

If you have any concerns or question regarding our programs, please ask freely.

We mainly exist to help support and answer your questions.

You identity is kept confidential and will never be revealed or published without your consent.
[email protected]

If you believe you need immediate assistance, call 911 or your local crisis line.

Phone

+1 778 381 5686

Copyright © 2020 SoberLife Foundation. All rights reserved.

Addiction to Self-Judgment

Addiction to Self-Judgment

Phone

+1 778 381 5686

Addiction to Self-Judgment

“I’m such a jerk. How could I have said that?”
“I’m a looser. I’ll never get anywhere.”
“I’m so stupid. I should have learned this by now.”
“I don’t fit in. I don’t belong with these people.”
“I’ll never be good enough. I’ll never do it right enough.”
“I’m permanently emotionally damaged. I’ll never be okay.”
“No one could love me. I’m not lovable.”

…and so on and so on.

Are you aware of your self-judgments? Are you aware of how often you judge yourself as bad, wrong, or inadequate? Are you aware of how you end up feeling as a result of your self-judgments?

In my counseling work with people, I find that self-judgment is one of the major causes of fear, anger, anxiety and depression. Yet most people don’t realize that these painful feelings are the result of their own thoughts, their own self-judgments. Most of the time, when I ask an anxious client why they are feeling anxious, they tell me that it’s because of something that happened to them. They usually believe that an event or a person caused their anxiety. Yet when I ask them what they are thinking that might be causing their anxiety, they will tell me a self-judgment such as, “I’ll never get this right,” or they are projecting their own judgment onto me and telling themselves, “Margaret doesn’t like me,” or “Margaret is getting impatient with me.” When they judge themselves or make up that I’m judging them, they get anxious. There is nothing actually happening that is causing their anxiety, other than their own thoughts.

Pointing out to them that they are causing their anxiety with their self-judgment doesn’t not necessarily stop the judgment. This is because self-judgment is often an addiction. An addiction is a habitual behavior that is intended to protect against pain. What is the pain that self-judgment is intended to protect against?

Generally, the hope of self-judgment is to protect against rejection and failure. The false beliefs are that, “If I judge myself, then others won’t judge me and reject me. I can be safe from others’ judgment by judging myself first,” or “If I judge myself, I can motivate myself to do things right and succeed. Then I will feel safe and be loved and accepted by others.”

However, just as a child does far better in school with encouragement than with criticism, so do we as adults. Criticism tends to scare and immobilize us. Instead of motivating us, it often creates so much anxiety that we get frozen and become unable to take appropriate action for ourselves. More self-judgment follows the lack of action, which results in more anxiety and immobilization, until we create a situation where we are completely stuck and miserable.

The way out of this is to become aware of the feelings of fear, anxiety, anger or depression and then ask yourself, “What did I just tell myself that is creating this feeling?” Once you become aware of the self-judgment, you can then ask yourself, “Am I certain that what I am telling myself is true?” If you are not 100% certain that what you are telling yourself is true, you can ask your higher, wise self or a spiritual source of wisdom, “What is the truth?” If you are really open to learning about the truth, the truth will pop into your mind, and it will be much different than what you have been telling yourself.

For example, “I’m such a jerk. How could I have said that?” becomes “We all mess up at times. It’s okay to make mistakes – it’s part of being human. Making a mistake does not mean that you are a jerk.” When we open to the truth, we will discover a kind and compassionate way of speaking to ourselves, a way that makes us feel loved and safe rather than anxious, angry or depressed.

Addictions are always challenging to resolve, and an addiction to self-judgment is no exception. So be easy on yourself, and don’t judge yourself for judging yourself! It will take time and dedication to become aware of your self-judgments and learn to be kind toward yourself, but the end result is so worth the effort!

Contact Our Volunteers

Your consultation is absolutely free - Let’s talk!

Got Questions ?

If you have any concerns or question regarding our programs, please ask freely.

We mainly exist to help support and answer your questions.

You identity is kept confidential and will never be revealed or published without your consent.
[email protected]

If you believe you need immediate assistance, call 911 or your local crisis line.

Phone

+1 778 381 5686

Copyright © 2020 SoberLife Foundation. All rights reserved.

A New Definition Of Drug And Alcohol Addiction And Treatment – Substance Abuse Has No Societal Boundaries

A New Definition Of Drug And Alcohol Addiction And Treatment – Substance Abuse Has No Societal Boundaries

A New Definition Of Drug And Alcohol Addiction And Treatment – Substance Abuse Has No Societal Boundaries

An addict is not considered an addict just because he drinks and drugs too much, nor because his life spirals downwards because of drugs. These are just predictable symptoms of the progressive disease. Perhaps if we had a new definition for addiction, it would not be so difficult to accept that individuals may be suffering from a disease that will eventually destroy their lives.

We have all heard that addiction is a disease, but how do we truly feel about this issue? When you hear the word “addict”, do you think of a junkie, crack addict, prostitute, or a homeless person who begs for money on a street corner? When you here the word addict, do you think of a lowlife, who has unacceptable behaviors, and lower morals? Do you somehow believe that their life circumstance is their fault and that they could, “just say no?”

A successful CEO, attorney, doctor, or professional with a substance abuse problem, would not fall into the category of addict according to the stereotypical definition. Perhaps, this is one of the reasons why a professional with a drug problem, alcohol included, does not easily consider himself to be addicted and readily seek addiction treatment . Success in other venues tends to convince the professional that he can also handle this problem as well, especially when he compares himself to addicts who have bottomed out and not entered a drug rehab. If the addicted professional is still semi-functioning and has not yet lost their job, house or family, his denial system will still be relatively intact.

Perhaps if we had a new definition for addiction, it would not be so difficult to accept that individuals may be suffering from a disease that will eventually destroy their lives. According to the American Medical Association, in order for a illness to be classified as a disease, it must meet one of the following criteria. It must be either progressive, predictable or terminal. Addiction qualifies as a disease by meeting not just one, but all three criteria. An addict is not considered an addict just because he drinks and drugs too much, nor because his life spirals downwards because of drugs. These are just predictable symptoms of the progressive disease.

Everyone knows that there are blood and urine tests to determine if drugs or alcohol are present in the body. Few of us are aware that there is now a test which determines whether someone has the DNA for the addiction. There is a “Y” factor in the genetic coding of alcoholics and addicts. This genetic makeup determines how the body processes, and breaks down alcohol or drugs in the system. This “Y” factor distinguishes the addict from the drug abuser.

An addict born with the DNA coding, or Y factor, is similar to the person who is born with the predisposition for cancer, diabetes, or lupus. As with cancer, when certain favorable conditions exist the diseases will activate and progress. For those with the addictive gene, once addictive chemicals are introduced into the body, the disease activates. It does not matter whether the addictive drugs are prescribed by a doctor or bought illegally.

There are exceptions to this genetic predisposition guideline. While the children of addicts will almost certainly have the addictive gene, in some instances, it may skip a generation. However, some who do not have the genetic coding for addiction, will also become addicted. Why? Drugs like crack cocaine have been designed in laboratories to intentionally cross over this genetic line, and become instantly addictive. Have you ever heard of a social crack cocaine smoker? This drug causes someone to bottom out at a much faster pace.

Drugs change the brain’s receptors sites. Enough drug usage can permanently alter the brain, and its ability to absorb vital nutrients. Our receptor sites are similar to loading docks in the brain, sending and receiving messages continually. These messages are sent through chemicals which are moved about though electrical surges. Not only do drugs alter the chemical balance in the brain, they eschew the pattern of energy pulses. But the most damaging effect of drug usage is permanent change in the cell walls, upon which other cells dock, much like how a key fits into a lock. If the lock is changed then the key won’t fit.

If you knew that you have the genetic coding for a disease, wouldn’t you do everything in your power to keep the disease from activating before the need for a drug rehab program? If you understood that your disease was actively progressing, wouldn’t you seek drug treatment? How can you help someone who does not yet realize that they need help? Family, friends, and co-workers are in a position to see the effects of drugs, long before the addicted has a clue.